In response to the widely publicized videos displaying an altercation between a young adult couple, I have delayed the release of my planned blog to address domestic violence.  The elevator scene was noteworthy as another representation of the degree to which violence has become an acceptable response to conflict in American culture.  In my opinion, the behavior is an extension of what has been increasingly demonstrated on television, in our method of communicating, song lyrics, movies and popular video games. Practicing restraint no longer appears to be virtuous while physical aggression is being glorified.  Because domestic violence is commonly inflicted on those who are weaker or defenseless, it is no wonder that 1 in 4 women have been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner as reported by the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey in 2011.

While domestic violence awareness has been acutely heightened, I implore all who are passing judgment on the family involved to proceed with caution lest your attention becomes stalled on the events surrounding that fateful night. Instead, consider galvanizing your concern for victims of abuse and participate in efforts for prevention. At a minimum, refuse to perpetuate derogatory methods of referring to women, like the all too common use of the disrespectful term beginning with the letter B'. Christians know that all things work for good for those who love God and we are indeed being called to assure good comes from the renewed focus on this issue.

Ladies, I also encourage you to proceed with caution as you choose and accept the attention of a potential mate. If the only prerequisite for your affection is based on a man's appearance, affluence or influence, you allow your future to be dependent on the limited capacity of a man as opposed to the immeasurable graciousness of God. In order to receive all that He has planned for you, be patient and become confident that your suitor has a true relationship with the Lord. Men of God do not have to be policed because they respect the Lord.  A man's desire to serve and glorify Him prevents destructive behaviors to anyone.

Assuredly, intimate partner violence is not gender specific and I have advised women to refrain from striking men because they may not all choose to turn the other cheek. So, to those who decide to hit, proceed cautiously for violence indeed, begets violence; everyone should aspire to not touch any living being in anger. If your relationship with anyone has evolved into one characterized by harsh words, raised voices and/or physical altercations, love is no longer the foundation and the consequences of these behaviors are potentially grave. Counseling from a trusted, unbiased source is strongly encouraged to help you determine if the relationship is salvageable or if it is time to let it go.

On a final note, over 100 years ago courageous Americans unified to demand women's right to vote and it culminated in the passage of the 19^th amendment in 1920. Unfortunately, our unification is long overdue for holding our lawmakers and judicial system accountable for the establishment and enforcement of laws that would prevent the continued mistreatment of women. I advise all eligible voters to therefore proceed with caution when voting during the November midterm elections and remember domestic violence has no partisanship.  Require that those who are soliciting your vote add domestic violence law revision to their platforms.  Then, make it impossible for lawmakers to put this issue on the back burner once elected. Our laws are needlessly weak and because of the tendency for victims of domestic violence to retract their statement, habitual offenders continue undeterred.

Victims commonly fail to cooperate with prosecution out of fear of retaliation, embarrassment or loss of livelihood. As a society, we must reserve judgment on the subsequent actions of victims and instead focus on enhanced domestic violence prevention. We must demand laws that have gradations for punishment that are proportionate to the severity of the violent act regardless of the number of prior offenses. We must assume for the above listed reasons that most priors go unreported.  Almost one third of women in the United States have been slapped, punched or shoved by an intimate partner according to the 2010 National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey. For the safety of all women, we have to keep domestic violence awareness and prevention efforts alive. Its ugliness prevails in the diverse cultures of this nation and we must unify to support those who have been harmed and remove this injustice from our land. To end violence against women, it is not our stature, but our voice that counts.